I was going to write about suicide but then I realized that was a bad idea.
Today kinda sucks and I feel so stressed that I’m going to burst. I see no hope in the future, save for my life with Julie. I see the world spiraling downward toward an inescapable doom and wonder, “truly, what is the point?”
I’m sure a lot of this is due to the fact that Julie is out of town this week and it’s the first time I’ve slept alone in year. Also for consideration, school deadlines looming at the edge of my subconscious. I’m not normally so fucking pessimistic but it’s been getting to me lately.
But anyway… How are you doing? Are you holding up okay? I’m sorry that I’ve been a bummer lately but that doesn’t mean you need to feel bad or overly concerned for me. I’ll be fine. I always get better. It’s probably just a lack of vitamin D and sunlight. The sunset here is around 4 or so now, and the mornings are shrinking, too. So if you’re living in the North, don’t forget to take care of yourself. Lord knows I do, and too often at that.
But yeah, I hope you’re well and that you are working towards some good stuff. I have a pretty bleak outlook, but I’m also often wrong. If we all get together to work towards a better, more positive world, I’m sure we turn all the bad shit around and get back on track. Or something. I’m rambling now, so I’mma go.